love myself

I just posted.
But I had been thinking about something for a while and it didn't really fit with the last post.
Lately one of my struggles has been due to a change in me. This change wasn't really IN me but ON me. I may or may not have gained my freshman 15 this summer and that was ON me but I let it become something INside me. Does that make sense?
Since I really noticed this "big" change I became very insecure and angry. At myself. Because I let it happen. Other things added to it but I think I took out all of my emotions on my body.
I went through a cycle of hopelessness, to over ambition, to anger, over and over again. I would talk to my mom about it and after the days and weeks passed I realized a few things.
1. My mom made me realize that it could be a lot worse. I could have developed a disease or lost an arm or burned my face off. But I didn't. I gained a little amount of weight that probably only I could notice. I had a body. That is a pretty neat thing to begin with.
2. It's a choice. It's important to be healthy. It's important to love your body. There's also a line between loving your body and being comfortable with your bad habits. I realized that I had to find the happy  medium of being happy the way I am, but still doing my best to eat well and be active.
3. I was at the grocery store today and I thought, "sometimes I feel like I'm feeding a little kid." I came to think that was actually a pretty good thought. Would I starve a child? No. Would I give the child food he/she liked? Yes. Would I let them throw away healthy food they didn't feel like eating or they didn't like? No. Would I let a child sit and watch TV all day? No. Would I encourage them to be active and happy? Yes.

With the combination of these thoughts I came to a conclusion that sometimes I might have to love who I am and treat myself like a child. Because being an adult is hard sometimes and it's not always fun, but I am also in a place where I have to parent myself and make choices. No mother would hate her child for no reason and the reasons I was coming to hate myself were so invalid.

 I saw this quote recently. So I used the handy tool on the website to create this picture:
When I was around 18, I looked in the mirror and said "You're either going to love yourself or hate yourself." And I decided to love myself. That changed a lot of things. Queen Latifa

This quote immediately made me think differently. It's an obvious statement, but it really just got me. 
I find it so applicable in more than loving our bodies. Today I was upset because I thought I was bad at decorating- hate myself. Today my hair looked dumb-hate myself. Today my legs looked pretty good!-love myself. Today I tried to be productive all day and found time to spend with an old friend-love myself. Remember things I have accomplished-love myself!!

There's a million choices to love myself or hate myself and I think things can get a lot better if I really love myself.  People who love themselves will help themselves succeed. They will not guilt themselves.  I'm not saying to be selfish, I honestly think by learning to show love to yourself you will also be more accepting of others. 

I'm posting this today to commit to this. I am making a change. I am going to DECIDE TO LOVE MYSELF. I will hopefully see it change a lot of things.

Will you decide to love yourself?





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